Again

The disturbed sleep. The paleness. The exaustion. The breathlessness and the dizziness. The temperature. The visit to the gp. The we need to treat it a little more agressively. The feeling that we are getting no where fast. The sheer terror I feel when I realise that this may be our reality for the whole of winter. The god awful feeling in my stomach when I realise our baby girl is so sick. The isolation, both real and imagined. The struggle to cope with day to day life without checking on her constantly. The wish that she feels better soon. We love you princess xxx

Catch up

Another hospital stay. An incredibly bad hospital stay. Some funny stories though. Our 5 year old made a cardiology registrar throw a tantrum...very very funny. Last hospital stay she cut through her IV line.
We met the Brisbane Broncos. Chloe charmed one of them into our room and she coyly waved at him. Then 5 or so others came in. The irony, I have never watched a game of rugby league in my life. I had NO idea who these men were and it was so so wasted on us LOL.
The bad things. The way we were treated. The fact that I was treated as a naughty little girl for voicing my opinion on what was going on. The total disempowering of parents in medical issues that they have lived for years on end.
Enough for now, I will return when I am not so angry about what happened.

Happy birthday gorgeous girl

My big girl was 8 a few days ago. How did that happen ? When did that happen ? She is gorgeous and grown up and clever and funny and serious and caring and flippant and just divine. She had a birthday party at our local bowling alley. There were us, my mum and dad, both my sisters, my nephew and 5 of her friends. Greg's parents came for a while and bought the girls great grandfather who will be 91 later this year. He is so gorgeous with the girls and they are very lucky to have such a special man in their lives. So are we :)
Anyway bowling was great fun. All the girls and Liam, our nephew, had a great time. Lots of noisy giggling and shouting and lots and lots of fun.
For her birthday Jess got lots of Hannah Montana and High School Musical stuff. She also got lots of books. Oh and a purple cat which was from Chloe and her favourite present. Sisters really do know these things it seems. She also got a Veronicas jacket from dear friends of ours. Well she is now the queen of cool. She can alternate it with the High School Musical Jacket from other darling friends. A girls heaven really :)
I can't believe that 8 years ago I had no idea how my love for a child would be so strong. 8 years ago I had no idea I could love my husband more than I did then. There is nothing like seeing the man you love parent your children. Nothing like seeing a tiny baby cradled in big hands. Or a little hand clinging to a daddy hand. Or the laughter that echoes while daddy's play rough. 8 years ago we were so blessed to be given a Jessica to love. You are brave, beautiful, clever and most of all you always bring sunshine to those around you. We love you gorgeous girl. xxxx